Cursive

Cursive, the biggest lie a teacher ever told you. I’m sure most of you grew up with this idea that cursive was going to be everywhere in the adult world. When I learned it in 3rd grade, my teacher told me that if I didn’t master cursive that life would be very difficult for me. Well guess what Mrs. Davenport? I’m doing just fine and it’s no thanks to your lousy advance. That lady use to drill it into my head that if I couldn’t write in cursive then I was destined to work a minimum wage job my whole life. It would be one thing if Veronica Vaughn was teaching me cursive. At least she was a smoke. Mrs. Davenport was some middle aged woman who smelled like death and would always ramble about how great her stupid kids were.

I honestly don’t know a single person who writes in cursive. Actually I take that back. I have encountered two people that write in cursive and they fucking suck. One of them was an English professor I had my freshman year. She use to write in cursive because she legit thought that it made her more intellectual. Do you know how dumb you have to be to actually believe that nonsense? I’m not surprised she got canned a year later. No one could read her lecture notes because THEY WERE IN FUCKING CURSIVE. The other was one of my little brothers friend. The kid was weird. He would always come over to our house and study with my little brother. Like 6th grade ACTUALLY matters. Don’t be a weirdo and study ancient Mesopotamia, go do normal middle school shit like discover porn or talk to sexual predators on Omegle.

Twitter: @paddyp3000